Marrying Into a Rich Family (Pros & Cons)

I am sure it is the goal of many to either become rich themselves or try any avenue possible towards a good money pot achievable through traditional means. This, of course, implies that becoming rich is one of your stated goals in life. However, for me personally, money and wealth are essential factors to free yourself from certain pressuring aspects of life. It makes it obviously easier to enjoy what is most important to you, be it nice holidays with friends or the more materialistic route of having a nice car or house others envy you for. 

When I was 18, I was learning to drive a car. Pretty much all pupils in my class went to the same driving instructor, a small bearded fellow who was quite quirky and funny. I remember all too well when we talked about money and wealth. He came from humble beginnings but made it unmistakably clear to me that if you are born poor, that’s ok, but if you don’t marry a rich person, that’s your fault! I was too young back then to analyse and think about his words. However, many years later, I can now confidently reflect on his point, which I believe is invalid as many more important aspects of life and marriage come before any measure of success is counted by how wealthy you are. 

This post goes through the pros and cons of marrying into a rich family. It might be glamorous, but maybe not all aspects are that great after all. Read on and judge for yourself.

Is it better to marry a rich man or woman?

It is of utmost importance to marry someone you truly love and want to spend the rest of your life with. I know this might sound corny, but to me rings true. Of course, it would be an added bonus if they come with decent wealth, but it is by no means a prerequisite for me. 

For others, however, marrying someone rich seems right up there before anything else. I believe that everyone has the right to choose for her or himself what’s best and that of course applies to selecting their life companion as well. 

“For better or worse”, as the traditional marriage vows go implies exactly that the importance of monetary wealth does not mean or matter for a fruitful and enjoyable marriage together.

Is it possible to marry rich?

Historically and to some degree still valid in certain countries and cultures marrying someone of a different wealth status was strictly unapproved of or even forbidden. Parents, many generations ago, were interested in their daughter or son finding someone of equal societal status which obviously meant wealth as well. 

Luckily, historical norms have drastically changed in our modern times and society where anyone is relatively free to marry who they choose, aside from any family preferences as well. Statistically speaking, however, it obviously matters where someone is likely to find their partner. 

Analysing a 2017 survey by the highly acclaimed Standford University, 39% of heterosexual couples meet through online dating channels, which is a whopping increase from only 2% in 1995. This, obviously can be highly effective in matching people who are not from equal societal / money status. Meeting someone online, however, also ideally requires you to live somewhere relatively close by. So, if you live in some of the most expensive cities like New York City or San Francisco you will likely meet someone who at least has the means to live there. 

So yes, it is absolutely possible to marry someone rich if you are not. My former roommate, for example, married into a really wealthy family although he is from a more middle-class background. Attending their wedding was immediately clear how wide the economical gap between their families was. This, however, had no bearing on whether should get married or not. So make sure you find a rich family who is approving and doesn’t care about your own and your family’s financial status. 

Can rich and poor marry?

Yes, of course. In modern, western societies rich can absolutely marry partners from less affluent backgrounds. The circumstances of any given marriage, however, can be more intricate than the overall answer to the question.

With divorce rates running at around 50% on all marriages in the US, a prenup agreement is usually advisable and in certain cases where the economic gap between rich and poor is large a necessity in order to get married. The legal document, which is by law enforceable protects some of the economical wealth brought to the table. A prenup, therefore, ensures that, in case of a divorce, certain economics are protected from splitting wealth in the normal equal split. 

A Harvard article estimates that roughly 5-10% of all US couples have a prenup agreement. Usually, coming from a wealthy finally could also mean that parents might demand a prenup agreement from their children in order to protect their own assets and wealth. 

Is it worth it to marry for money?

Look, I have to be honest, but I would never be able to answer this question for you, nobody will but yourself. Circumstances can be very different. Is it possible to find your princess or prince, that loves you and is perfect for you (and your money)? Yes, absolutely. 

Marrying for the sole purpose of acquiring money and a more leisurely lifestyle can of course be worth it, but at what cost? There are a few questions, however, I would suggest everyone should be thinking about before making such a decision, for example:

• Will I be able to pursue a happy marriage with this person even if there is no money?
• What likely prenup agreements will have to sign and what do they mean in reality?
• Will my family get along with my partner’s family?
• How and in what environment will able to be raising my children, and what do I want them to be?
• Will I still be able to see my friends from time to time and where will we live?
• Will I be able to follow my dream and pursue a career or interest?
• Is my partner going to make me happy, regardless of the money?

Is it necessary to marry someone rich?

The necessity to marry someone rich really depends on a person’s individual circumstances. The old story of parents trying desperately to find a rich husband for their daughters is typically a script for the movie screens rather than real life. 

It is, in my opinion, not a necessity at all if you are offered alternative paths to secure your financial freedom. Many different avenues are these days available to anyone to educate themselves and therefore pursue a career in the area of their interest. 

There are however a certain number o people solely on the hunt to secure themselves a trophy husband or wife. Their stated goal, so it seems is to live a glamorous, job-free, life that propels them straight away to the top of the societal ladder. Good luck to them. 

Should I marry for money or love?

I am no marriage or relationship guru but I would certainly marry someone only for love. Of course, marriages are not easy and full of compromises on many fronts but the main tenets of your hopefully long-lasting relationship should be built on heart not dollar notes in my opinion. With divorce rates being around 50% you will encounter likely turbulence over the tenure of your marriage, regardless of whether you have money or not. 

In many ways, I think, having money might complicate things and therefore likely increases the pressure points in a relationship. 

Are wealthy couples happier?

There is a plethora of scientific research over decades on the subject of happiness. Wealth, so certain studies show can only buy you “happiness” up to a certain point. That point is usually where someone’s basic needs of food, shelter and security are covered. 

That is one of the aspects why in wealthier nations happiness is really the subject of your general purpose in life, your social connections as well as benefitting others with your work. 

We have gone through several articles and it would appear that indeed wealth caused couples more problems than it’s benefitting them. The reason is pretty simple. With more wealth comes more options and opportunities and therefore more disagreements amongst couples on what to prioritize. A higher degree of materialistic desires is also often the fighting ground amongst couples. First-world problems indeed but make no mistake that those rather unimportant things can cause a rift in relationships. 

Conclusion

Marrying into a rich family has its pros and cons. On the one hand, it can provide financial security and a more leisurely lifestyle. On the other hand, it can complicate relationships and create pressure points. Ultimately, it is up to the individual to decide whether or not to marry for money.